depression thread

Started by Anna Karina, August 11, 2014, 11:58:13 PM

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Anna Karina

Been real emotional lately. I should be happy because my best friend from college is finally coming out to visit next month after me trying to convince him for six years. But lately I've had this incredibly heavy feeling that something absolutely dreadful is going to happen in the next few months. Feels like those cartoons where a cloud just constantly pours down on you and no one else.

Anna Karina

I just choked up during a damn episode of Hotel Hell.

Rapture Ready Blowhard

I've been feeling weird and depressed too.  I think part of it is that I'm on the job hunt again and that always makes me feel anxious and inadequate, and part of it is just a (sort of well-founded) feeling that my life is passing me by and that I'm basically treading water in a place that I don't particularly care for.

Hope you feel better, dude.

Phitney

#3
I've been feeling a bit down, as well. I'm in this rural area and I hate it. I spend way too much time at home. I recently ran into friends from high school that are still here but all they want to do is drink 40s in the park. I'm kind of trying to stay away from drinking and just things that are bad for me to consume anyway because I've gained weight this year.

I just had an opportunity present itself to move to Virginia Beach and I've already told them I'll move. I haven't yet told my family or my derby league/ref crew. They're not going to be happy about it. I just can't keep living here. My grandma has been keeping tabs on me and after 8 years of living on my own, I can't handle it. I had to text her to let her know I was staying with a friend last weekend and the next day she just kept asking questions and prying. It's causing too much stress. I love my family to death, but I'm not used to people prying into every aspect of my personal life anymore.

Courtney

VIRGINIA BEACH!? Let's be best friends.

murray

I've been really bummed out because Monday I found out a friend died who I had sat next to, worked with, and exchanged thoughts and jokes with for the passed two years.  Unfortunately no one I can tell gave a shit and all the buzz is about Robin Williams and how great of a friend he is to everyone on and off the internet.  Maybe this bothers me because I'm sensitive right now.  Or maybe it's because I'm tired of rich, privileged celebrities getting more attention than youth being shot up by cops in the city I live.

Or maybe I just miss my friend :(

AaronTheCabe

Fuck all.
No more sleeping, no more living
thousand miles away
Always leaving
Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back breakfast

Courtney

I realize I'm really lucky in that I'm still on my mom's fairly good health insurance until the end of the year, and can afford stupidly high co-pays when necessary.

With that said, I really wish that some of y'all would seek psychiatric help if you're able to do so. To some, it feels like giving up. To me, it's admitting that for the time being, things are too rough to handle without professional help. I'd rather not put my whole story out there on the internet, but if anyone needs someone to talk to who's recently been through hell, you're more than welcome to PM me.

Phitney

Quote from: Courtney on August 12, 2014, 08:01:07 PM
VIRGINIA BEACH!? Let's be best friends.

Oh man! Are you living there? This is gonna be awesome!

Courtney

I'll be your neighbor in Norfolk! It's only about 20 minutes to most places in Virginia Beach from here, and I'm over there all the time. Yayyyy!

Phitney

Ahhh yayyy!! We should hang at the beach and wherever else is cool to go! I'm excited. Now I'll know two people there!

rory

I have no idea what I'm doing with my life and everything seems so useless.
Quote from: Winged Killick
I'm an anarchist, but I'm not going to drive ninety-five miles an hour down the road tossing illegal, invasive species of snakes from my car while texting and fraudulently doing my taxes.

Joe

Quote from: rory on August 31, 2014, 09:25:49 PM
I have no idea what I'm doing with my life and everything seems so useless.

ditto. I know the feeling will pass, and then I will begin to feel stoic about it, and then that will lead to feeling at the top of the world, and then for whatever reason I'll return to depression.

The biggest existential thorn-in-my-side as of late, is not having anyone to talk about big philosophical stuff with... or even little philosophical stuff, I guess.  Its not that I want to make everything a big deal, but right now I feel like every conversation is a list of someone's daily activities, which are usually a repeat of yesterday's activities.

maybe I'm just a fart head.

michaelcopeland

I know this thread died a while ago, but I'm not feeling well and need to complain. I think I'm an alcoholic, also I may be homeless soon. I want to go back to college but I dropped out twice already. Also I don't really enjoy things like playing music nearly as much as I used to.

Joe

this thread will never die, and you are using it appropriately.  depression is a mother fucker.

tinybitsofheart

i guess i've struggled with something like depression for years now. it's not getting any better and this time of year is always a real killer so i finally went to the doctor and he started me off on a small dose of lexapro so we'll see where that goes

i never know if i'm "actually" depressed or if i need to make some major lifestyle changes (not that those are always easy or possible to do, but still)

michaelcopeland

Sometimes a lifestyle change really can pull you out of a depression. I think i get the most depressed when I stay in one place for two long. I have 2 shows coming up so I guess I have some time to prepare, but after that I think I'm packing my bag, putting my thumb out, and getting back on the road for a while.

rory

I seem to have all kinds of friends casually, but when it comes down to seeking out time with anyone specifically, I am filled with anxiety and sadness, not a list of people I can count on.

Drinking by myself and getting up the gumption to bug people on facebook hasn't even panned out positively.

Sometimes I feel like I'm reverting 3 years back. Some days even further. I feel like I distanced myself from a lot of dumb petty behavior, and it's all coming right back now that my life isn't so structured and my partner is away. I'm a 25 year old acting like a 22 year old that was immature for their age.
Quote from: Winged Killick
I'm an anarchist, but I'm not going to drive ninety-five miles an hour down the road tossing illegal, invasive species of snakes from my car while texting and fraudulently doing my taxes.

pronetoaccidents

at random times during random days I start crying for a few moments when I'm alone. usually I stepped off the job to smoke a cigarette, or I think about how my mom died so young, or that one day my girlfriend will die and I will die and so will everyone. then I usually break out laughing a little bit after. most of my life is sadness and that's why I appreciate the little vacations from time to time.
Though lovers be lost love shall not.

AaronTheCabe

I don't think i cry enough
Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back breakfast

Anna Karina

#20
Ugh.

Anna Karina

#21
.

Anna Karina

#22
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Anna Karina

#23
.

pronetoaccidents

sadness. meloncholy. regret. chemicals. that's the weather as of late on my end.
Though lovers be lost love shall not.